What People Really Think About Gray Hair: Random Compliments

“My boss today said “I got to say… and I hope I am not overstepping… but your hair is looking really fabulous these days… my wife was complaining that her roots were going to show for the holidays because she hadn’t managed to snag an appointment at her salon… and I told her… you know… you could go silver… I have seen it looks incredible.” …. And THAT my friends is how a straight man gives an appropriate compliment”

“You will never have another man look at you.”

“You will look like an old Granny.”

“It will age you.”

“You are not ready for that.”

“It will look like you’ve given up.”

These are only a few comments that my best friend Steph, since high school, blurted out after telling her my decision to go gray. She is warming up to my two-toned ombre’ but won’t back down on the “looking older” part.

Last month, we were at our favorite champagne bar downtown and I noticed a VERY HOT- beautifully dressed younger man looking over at me several times. He was, obviously, with his girlfriend so I didn’t think he was a creeper or anything.  Steph then started to notice him looking at me and she asked me if I knew him… HOT guy says across the room, “Hey I just wanted to say that your hair is just absolutely stunning and I love your silvers coming in!” I immediately looked over at Steph, nudging her as she heard the whole conversation between us.  Then of course she got in on the conversation saying she loves it now, but she was very skeptical about it because she thought it would age me. He disagreed completely and admired my confidence.

We still giggle about the hot guy complimenting me at such a perfect time! Sometimes your best friends are the worst critics! But we still love them ‘cause, well, they are our besties.

Odd day…I work with 99% men. Truckers, dockworkers and such. I am a manager and only a brave few would ever comment about my hair. But today 3 men actually said “I like your hair.”

I had my most absolute favorite comment on my hair yesterday…my daddy who has Alzheimer’s reaches out and sweetly touches one of my silver curls. He asks me if my hair was naturally that color or if I made it that way. I told him I stopped dying it… he says, “It’s absolutely beautiful.” Then he looks at his wife and says, “Isn’t that just beautiful?” I am 50 and he is almost 80. But at that moment I felt like his little 5 year old daughter. It was such a special moment that I will treasure and hold on to.

I had to share a very sweet thing that happened today. I was in a retail store, and one of the young clerks hurried up to me as I left and I assumed she was going to ask me about the crocheted poppy headband I wear. No she wasn’t, and she said, “I have to tell you how beautiful your gray hair is, it’s a perfect color all over, I am sooo jealous!” I thanked her and told her that I would share her words with the group because we don’t always get that reaction in public.

I have been “seeing “ more and more Silver Sisters. I’m the kook that walks up and compliments them. I am obsessed. I think being a part of this group has raised my awareness of being more supportive both here and in the world.

Three days with my husband in ICU this weekend, and every one of his nurses, two housekeepers, and his cardiac care docs (one male, one female) told me how much they liked my hair (silver AND purple, but mostly the silver).

I had just come from a yoga class on Friday and called into the local bookshop. The lady at the counter said (as she was serving me), “I really like your hair; are you colouring the ends or are you growing it out?!” I explained, I was growing it out and we chatted, her throwing in a couple more compliments to my delight! She said she won’t be able to dye forever but…I jumped in and said possibly like me the day will just come when you say, “I’m ok with this, I’m not colouring anymore.” I didn’t want her to say something to counter those lovely compliments!

She said, “Yes, the day will probably come!!”

Each to their own, I say!

The other day a cashier told me, she liked my hair color. When I told her that I stopped dyeing it almost a year ago, she was so surprised and said I thought you had highlights done, it’s beautiful! She then went on to tell me how great she thought I looked! Totally made my day!!

Yessssssss…I once had two women stop me when I was leaving a Greenhouse because they HAD to see my hair up close. One of the women said she stopped her friend to look at me, and said, “Now that’s a beautiful woman.” I couldn’t be more proud of our sisterhood. I needed a build me up and the Universe answered beyond my dreams. ✨✨✨

I was about 8 months into my transition to grey and I was on the road at a different office for work. So I’m in the bathroom looking at my hotel hair and trying to fix my frizz (I think I forgot my gel lol) when a woman who has never spoken to me before smiles and says, “I love the colour of your silvers.” What a great thing to hear…especially when I was feeling like my hair was not looking right. It made my day!

I needed a trim but realized I didn’t want to go to my usual stylist. If I heard “I support your transition but remember I have a closet full of chemicals so you don’t have to own it…Or, really you should just cut it short and go faster,” I would seriously Grrrr. I decided to roll the dice, walk into the first salon I came to in the mall that night, and get a trim. A young woman was the only one working and kept saying, “I hope you don’t mind I am looking at all of your colors,” during the wash, trim and blow dry. I started laughing and let her know I didn’t mind at all and, that I was a bit obsessed with looking at them too. After I paid her, I thanked her for not once mentioning coloring or to take more off the ends then I wanted. She replied, “Oh no you can’t do that! Your hair looks so pretty, healthy and cared for. In fact, I was just looking at picture of a woman with long flowing gray white hair the other day and realized how really beautiful she looked. I just know this will be you.” I think she probably is still recovering from the huge hug I gave her. And, I promised to come back and let her look at my colors and be a part of my journey.

… I really felt like her compliment was to all of us, her just recently seeing that picture and me happening to walk in confirmed we really do exist.

At my work, a coworker came around at the beginning of the year, asking to take pictures of staff for the first quarterly meeting. He said it was going to be light and fun – so he asked for a light-hearted new year’s resolutions if we had one and if not, he was going to come up with one. When he got to me, he asked me to flip my hair to the other side, which showed my grey streak. During the quarterly meeting, he ran a slide show of all the pictures he’d gotten with a resolution. On mine, he put “Anna’s New Year’s resolution is to grow more sparkles to brighten the world.” ✨

My doctor is a few years younger than I am. When I was in for a physical this week, she stopped and said, “This is so random, but I love your hair.” I am only 31 and 2 months into this transition, so compliments in this awkward stage are especially nice. She went on to explain that she is starting to get silvers and they stand out so much on her dark hair in comparison to her friends that all have lighter hair. She has been contemplating dyeing her hair to cover the silvers but loved her natural color. Seeing mine, she is now thinking she will just leave it natural.

I got two compliments yesterday. The first one was from a cashier at a convenience store. She said, “Oooh, I love your hair. I’ve never seen anyone with 3 colors of hair like that!” Lol. I have moved past the skunk stripe stage and I am currently rocking the calico cat look. The other comment was just a simple “I love your hair color. That is so cool.” It was followed by “Is that a genetic thing? You look very young to have all that gray.” I have been told my hair looks like I did this on purpose and it looks “mysterious.” I get comments on it all the time including people quoting the Bible about Gray hair is the crown of the righteous.

Yesterday a coworker said that it looked like I had purposefully colored my hair to look like it does…she loved it!

I’m 9 months into quite a tough, contrasting cold turkey transition.

I think one of the biggest compliments I’ve had…is being told by two friends that I inspired them to ditch the dye. 😊💖

I began this “journey to silver,” not knowing at all what to expect. After almost 5 months, I’m loving it, and I get compliments every single day from someone! I know I’ve inspired a few people to give it a try. If I can help someone in any way, I would be glad to!

My brother is a hairstylist and told me I shouldn’t do it. Once I did, he said he was wrong and told me it looked really pretty. I told him he should become known as the hairstylist who doesn’t try to talk women out of stopping coloring their hair and instead showed them how to transition with different hairstyles, products, and encouragement. I thought it would be good to be known, as a hair stylist who champions women that way instead of automatically saying No, you won’t look good.

I recently had low lights put in to hide the ‘skunk’ line. I went to a new stylist, who had great reviews for doing this. (My usual was nervous with my grey hair.) As he was looking at my hair he said, “Your hair is going to be so pretty when your journey is done.” He now has become my full time hair stylist.